Vengo Ahorra

One of my favorite phrases in the Dominican is “vengo ahorra.”

The translation of this would be “I am returning now”. So one might be talking to you and say I am going to borrow the keys and “vengo ahorra.” It means I will be back very soon, sort of. Anyone who has been in the Dominican Republic for a week or more knows that this could be five minutes later, one hour later, or maybe six hours later depending on how many people they bump into and spend time with in route.

In the United States if we say I am on my way we really mean it. Generally, if we still have time left someplace we will say I am leaving in however many minutes. There is clearly a difference between the two cultures in this respect. I have noted a few cultural differences in other writings.

After every trip to the USA I come back and realize there is something that has bitten me about my home country. In the past it has been foods, consumption, spirituality and of course hot sauce. As Dominicans are asking me how my time went in the USA I tell them it was too fast, literally.

Everything in the USA is fast which is I feel a problem in and of itself. Perhaps what has jumped out at me the most this time back in the USA was how we use the words associated with doing something fast, rapid, hurried or quick.

Do we ever listen to ourselves speak? Everything is done at high velocity even our speech. What may be easier to do is notice the words we use. We tell people we are going to do things fast but why? Recently, someone said to me, I am going to quickly make some coffee (referring to a percolator). I am not a coffee person but I know that the person can’t percolate coffee any faster than the coffee maker can percolate the coffee. Sure you can pour water into the percolator faster and scoop in all 5 scoops of coffee faster but how much faster is the coffee going to get made? Simple answer; it is not. Percolated coffee takes time. What really struck me in the face was when someone said recently, “Will you watch my baby real quick?” I did a double take. How on earth does anyone watch a baby, “real quick”?

I understood what my friend was saying but it caused me to wonder first how did that phrase enter our vocabulary and second how is it that people live by it? I know of someone who takes his wife away on a weekend get away once a quarter. They usually don’t do much of anything during these weekends although some trips have been rather posh. I respect this man a lot because he has made his wife a priority and rests with her and keeps his focus on their marriage. I have another friend who arises early each morning at 4:30am to simply read and be quiet before her day begins. One other friend of mine refuses to put her kids in organized sports until they are at least ten years old. Thank goodness there is one little boy who won’t lose his childhood to being a soccer mom’s kid.

I respect these things because it helps with focus and relational growth. A number of best sellers talk about taking the time to reflect and refocus including Seven Habits of Highly Effective People and Purpose Driven Life. Authors John Maxwell and Zig Ziglar mention it often as well. Billy Graham perhaps one of the busiest men of our time has said that he wishes he had spent more time with his family. We are being robbed of something extremely precious called relationships because we are in such a hurry.

Dominicans and Haitians know that without relationships we are missing a big piece of life. Speed is not everything in life. They will spend hours at someone’s house and then will say another interesting phrase….I am going to arrive. They don’t use the phrase I am “going to leave” or “it is time to leave”. I can’t say for sure why but I think if they tell their neighbor I am going to leave it sounds like they are not being welcomed anymore, an obvious insult to the host. So they say I am going to arrive… at my next destination. It says to the host, you are important so I am not leaving I am simply going to rest somewhere else, for the time being.

Voy a llegar ahorra.